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Date of Birth: 34
Sexual Status: straight single man
Latest Status: Reincarnated toaster.
City: Aurora, Colorado
Bio: I was put into the body of a pale and skinny loser, yet I still long for my former toaster life. The year was 1976, and as the final coil was placed into my heating elements at the General Electric appliance manufactuaring facility in Garkenbaugh, Idaho, I was born. It was lonely waiting in a box for so long. But, my solitude made it all the more sweet when an owner chose me. She fondled my electric prongs before she plunged me into her wall orifice for the first time. And oh, what incredible times we had. Muffins, waffles, hell, even a hot pocket from time to time. Yeah, she was naughty. But, our bond grew too strong, and eventually she took me everywhere, even in the bath with her. Well, you know what's coming next. While balancing on the edge of the tub, while I was toasting a pop tart, I stabbed her 8 times. It's not something I was proud of, but don't judge me, you don't know what it's like to be a toaster all of your life and then suddenly you grow arms and hands out of nowhere, and they happen to be clutching knives. Don't worry, I now know what NOT to do with knives, and arms.